The Past Present and Future
by Angelus Erreare
Summary: Shin Megami Tensei: Digital Devil Saga 2 Roland talks to Argilla about the men in her life and hopes perhaps, one day, he would be one of them. WARNING: SEMIAU, LANGUAGE, LIME. Serph x Argilla Heat x Argilla Roland x Argilla COMPLETE
1. Man in My Past

**The Past, Present and Future**

**By: Angelus Erreare **

**A/N: Disclaimer: All characters featured in this work of fiction all belong to ATLUS USA. I own nothing. **

**WARNING: SEMI-AU, OOC, SUGGESTIVE LANGUAGE **

**Note: My first attempt at a Roland/Argilla fanfiction. It was…hell to write this. I really don't like Roland. But still, variety is the spice of life. It's not a complete Roland/Argilla either. It's just SLIGHT Roland/Argilla.**

**Chapter 1: The Man in My Past**

Serph looked at the woman beside him; she was fast asleep. Her face was the epitome of serenity. Her eyelids were calm, her cheeks were stained with a light pink shade and her luscious lips were slightly parted.

She hogged their blanket to her chest, being greedy.

He chuckled; some things never change.

He sighed; she had been there with him the entire way…She had supported him when he led Embryon at the Junkland. But now, all that didn't matter. The Junkland was a dream…Embryon was no more. Their lives had been altered drastically.

Now, they took refuge at the broken down town called Lokapala. Their comrades were missing…That and the fact that the promised Nirvana was not paradise at all, but a new hellhole had him almost questioning the concept of divinity…and his own sanity. But throughout all that, she never abandoned him. She remained faithfully by his side.

That was why he was with her…He needed her. And she needed him.

Was this love?

Sighing, he pressed himself closer to her warm body, sharing in her warmth. She moaned in her sleep as he buried his face at the crook of her neck, lightly kissing her flesh.

She giggled in her sleep and whispered, "Heat…"

He stiffened.

Heat?

She was thinking of Heat? While he touched her…?

He felt a sense of insult within him. Were his assumptions about his lover merely assumptions? His chest tightened as his mind wandered. Did she like Heat? Did she miss him?

What about him? What was he to her?

'A mere pastime?' he thought with a hurtful cringe.

Well, whatever the answers were, he was going to find out the next day…

xxxxx

Argilla woke up with cold sweat. It was the same dream…

A dream of the past…

'The past? Or was it a past life…?' she asked herself.

It had been the same every night ever since they had left the Junkland. She didn't know how or why, but suddenly she began to have dreams of him. Not just of him, but of her. She suddenly found a lump in her throat. She dreamed of him and her…together.

'Serph!' her mind suddenly screamed.

She immediately felt for his body beside her and found the space empty. She blinked and in that instant, she hopped out of the bed.

She didn't like to hide things from him, but telling him that she had been dreaming of Heat would only upset him. There were so many questions that would float through his head and at the worst case…

'He might leave me…' she gulped; sweat trickling down her temple in apprehension.

xxxxx

Argilla came down by the dining room of the Lokapala HQ as bouncy and bubbly as ever, forgetting all about the dream. She saw her teammates and she waved at them, "Hey guys."

Gale looked at her with an expressionless face, "Argilla, sit."

Cielo reciprocated her cheerful gestures and waved back with a smile on his adorable and child-like face, "Eh Argilla! Come on! Let's have breakfast before Roland eats it all ja?"

"Hey!" Roland openly protested.

Argilla laughed and walked over to them. She noticed however that as she sat down, Serph refused to look at her. He didn't even whisper to her or anything. It was as if he didn't see or hear her.

She felt a knot in her stomach; had she upset him in some way?

Not wanting to rouse the suspicions of her comrades, she sat down and there, she locked eyes with the newest member of their team; Lokapala's leader, Roland.

She smiled at him tentatively, a blush creeping up her spine and then onto her face.

It wasn't really a secret that Roland had a fondness for her. Serph looked at her from the corner of his eyes and saw the slight interaction between her and Roland. He frowned slightly; not that he wasn't sulking already.

Roland liked her; didn't he?

He sighed.

She seemed to have noticed though as she put a hand on his shoulder, "Serph? Something wrong?"

He looked at her with cold eyes and stood, brushing her hand away, "No. Nothing. I'll just be outside."

Cielo sweat-dropped, "Oh mon…Leader's mad ja?"

Gale touched his forehead, "That's because you two were too insensitive?"

Here, Argilla almost choked on her coffee, "Insensitive?"

Cielo sweat-dropped and looked at Roland accusingly, "Yeah you too mon! You shouldn't really be flashing dose googly eyes of yours at Argilla in front of Serph ja?"

Roland blushed, "I was? Really? Well, I…uh…sorry about that…"

Argilla could only blur out the rest of the conversation. She wanted to run after Serph and ask him what was wrong. But she knew him. These were the moments that he'd rather be alone.

To him, solitude brought far more solace and comfort than emotionally soothing words from others. He'd rather deal with his problems by himself.

'Serph…'

xxxxx

She hadn't seen Serph at all that morning or the afternoon. He, Gale and Cielo had left for a mission to gather information at Karma city.

She felt her heart constrict; she had always accompanied Serph in most, if not all their missions, but now, he chose to leave her behind.

She frowned; he was really upset with her, wasn't he?

She sighed. Now, she sat atop the building of the Lokapala building, just gazing at the entire city, getting a bird's-eye view of the place.

"The world is a mess…I feel so alone…" she sighed, sighing, "I wish I was with…"

"Wish you were with whom?" a male voice whipped through the air.

"Roland!" she said, turning around and blushing as she realized that he may have overheard everything that she had said. Granted it wasn't a lot but the fact that she had been surprised irked her.

"Hey, this seat taken?" Roland asked; a silly boyish grin on his face.

She giggled, "No. Go ahead. Sit."

"Aa…nice view." he said as he sat beside her.

She chuckled, "You've lived here all your life and you haven't been up here to know that?"

He sweat-dropped, "Well, I really hated this place you know? Ever since those Karma bastards had set up this crazy rule about devouring our kind, everything was a freakin' mess." he sighed.

"I'm sorry to hear that." she said with outmost sincerity, touching his arm lightly as an attempt for consolation.

Roland looked at her hand; she did too and then, feeling the awkwardness seep in, she withdrew her hand with lightning speed.

"Er…" Roland hesitated, grappling for words to tell her. He scratched his head, "So…er…what's up with Serph today?"

"Hm?" she asked, looking up at him, "Serph? What about him?"

"He seems kinda out of it today." Roland replied, adjusting his glasses.

Argilla looked down and smiled ruefully, "He's just like that…He's awfully moody at times."

"What? You deprived him or something?" Roland slapped himself mentally as he realized the implications of his words. He was totally imposing on their privacy. 'Damn. She's gonna get pissed!'

He was mistaken, however, as she merely giggled, "I didn't do anything to him."

"That's precisely the point!" Roland laughed. He was glad that she didn't get offended by his crude remark; a pathetic excuse of a sexual innuendo.

She sighed, "I don't know…"

"So, you said something about being with someone…Who was it?" Roland asked, curious. Of course, she would probably say that it was Serph. He wasn't blind to what was going on between them. And the fact that they shared a room gave it all away.

"I don't really know…" she said.

Roland raised an eyebrow; she didn't know? How could she not know? Didn't she love Serph?

'Probably not…' he thought with no regret, but something with akin to…hope?

"I've been having dreams lately." she said, her pink eyes gazing into the town once more.

"Dreams? About what?"

She chuckled, "That's the sad and disturbing part. It wasn't about what; or should I say, it's not just about what. It's about whom."

"Okay…" he drawled, "What is it about and who is it about?" he asked calmly, almost convivially, trying to conceal his inner feeling of curiosity and interest.

She thought that it was disturbing right? Well, whatever she was dreaming of probably didn't include Serph. And if it did, it probably didn't spell out too well for him.

'Ouch…' he thought sadly, feeling for the silver-haired man.

"I dreamed about Heat." she deadpanned.

Roland arched an eyebrow and looked at her profile, "Heat is your comrade right? The missing one?"

She nodded without hesitation, "Yeah. He's the one all right."

"Why would you dream about him?" Roland asked, trying to quell the feeling of intrigue within his voice.

She laughed, shaking her head, "At first, I didn't know why…But as the days went by and I kept having the dreams, I knew that it was important. I began to think that maybe it was a memory…"

"And what does Serph think of all this?"

The answer to this question was what he had been dying to know. Yes; what did her silver-haired lover think of that? Undoubtedly, he'd be offended.

Wouldn't he?

'_I_ would be.' he thought knowingly. But still, he urged her to continue.

"He doesn't know."

"He doesn't?"

"No. I haven't told him. We have enough problems as it is. We don't need to deal with any more ludicrous issues such as dreams and stuff like that." she said, crossing her arms.

"Ah, I see. So," he said, gazing up at the heavens, "this Heat of yours…"

Argilla blushed as she heard the words "Heat of yours" from Roland. 'Heat was never mine…' she thought, shaking her head.

She stiffened, however, as she saw a flash of her dream enter her mind. She saw herself…and Heat…

They were within each other's arms…arduously kissing. She saw as he backed her against a wall, his hands grabbing her face, his tongue slipping within her mouth…eager to explore her mouth…and divulge her secrets…

Her blush deepened and Roland became concerned, "Argilla, are you okay?"

She snapped back from her reverie, "I'm fine. What were you saying?"

Roland sweat-dropped; so, she had not heard anything that he had said so far. She must be really preoccupied.

'This Heat person, whoever he is must really mean something to her.' he thought sadly.

"I was asking you about Heat. How was he? And what happened in your dream?"

Argilla brought her hand to her mouth and laughed heartily, "Wanna know about Heat? Well, he's hotheaded. He has a really bad temper. He'd growl and snarl at anyone who got in his way. Hahaha…but despite that, he's reliable and dependable."

Roland could only nod, "Sounds like a real good guy…in a bad-guy sort of way."

Argilla looked at him confusedly and Roland laughed nervously, "Never mind. Anyway, what does he look like? Good looking?"

Argilla blushed, "I…I suppose he's alright to look at. He's…six feet tall. He has a built body…and a messy plop of bright red hair…With a pair of bright red eyes. His hair is way longer than Serph's. And he's a stranger to a comb or a brush…" she finished, chuckling.

She sighed as she recollected Heat's appearance, focusing on the finer details of his face, "He has good and decent cheekbones, a well defined nose, a hard and firm jaw and a pair of lips that are…Never mind." she finished with a slight blush on her face.

Roland raised an eyebrow but said nothing.

"Good looking guy." Roland commented, nodding, "So, did you have something going with him? Before Serph, of course." he finished quickly.

Argilla stared at him; wide-eyed, "What?! With Heat? No! We were…er…we never looked at one another like that…"

"Never?" Roland prodded, "Not even any sort of funny interaction?"

Argilla thought deeply to their time in the Junkland and she blushed, saying nothing. Roland saw it and pointed his index finger at her, "Aha! I knew it!" he laughed.

Argilla swatted his finger away and snorted, "No. The only time he'd speak to me was when he was trying to convince me that devouring others was the only chance we had at survival. I remembered him being so adamant about it that I had to slap him! Ugh…he just kept on going on and on about it." she finished, pouting.

Roland chuckled.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing. At least, nothing yet." Roland had an idea building within him but he didn't want to divulge it yet; at least, not until he knew more about Heat and her dreams about him.

"So, what about your dreams? You said that perhaps it was a memory of some sorts?" he asked again, hoping that it would throw her off the scent of the bungling that he had just done.

"Oh well…right…I dreamed that…we were in some hospital. I dreamed that I was…a nurse!"

Roland raised an eyebrow and was about to speak when she put a finger in his lips, "Don't. Let me finished first."

He nodded and remained quiet, loving the way her skin felt against his lips…

"Then, I would see him there too. The dreams were unclear…but as they persisted I think I had a clear picture of what it was."

"And that is?"

"The dream was telling me, that before…in that world, at that time, Heat and I…we weren't just members of the Embryon; that we were real people…You know, the kind that have normal lives…No atmas, no demons, no Cuvier Syndrome; the kind that have jobs!"

"Wait a second. Not members of Embryon?" Roland asked, "Real people?"

Argilla nodded, "When we were at the Junkland, we were told that we were at Purgatory and should we win the war, we shall be delivered and forgiven. We would be brought to paradise; to Nirvana. But just before we had completely won, a man told us that…we were real people before; people who have died. And that our souls had just been transported in the Junkland; a land of eternal rain…with a yellow sky."

"So, with regards to the dream, maybe it was the previous life that I had…And maybe, that life…was with Heat."

Roland found whatever she was saying hard to swallow. So, by her definition, she wasn't a real human being. So, then, what was she doing here now? With him? Living and breathing? Was she telling him that she wasn't of flesh and blood?

"I don't really know how to explain it…But after that, we arrived here, in this world. This was the Nirvana that we were promised…"

"Sorry." he said sheepishly, humoring her story, "This isn't the paradise you were hoping for is it?"

She sighed and looked at him sadly, "No; it isn't. But still, things are unclear. That is why we have to find Sera and Heat. Sera knows something about our pasts! She knows what we are! Only she could help us."

"Do you understand your dreams now?"

She chuckled, "Yeah. I dreamed that Heat was a doctor…Hahahahaha…"

"Why do you laugh? Isn't that probable?" he asked frankly, with no hint of sarcasm.

She shook her head as she continued to laugh, "If you knew the Heat we knew from the Junkland, you'd be laughing too."

"Fair enough." Roland commented curtly. He deduced that this Heat person probably thought more from his fists rather than from his brains.

"You know, in that dream…No. Even as I'm awake, I sometimes see visions of him. I see visions of him and me…back then, at that world, at that time. I see us…and I feel…I feel as if I was really in love with him." she said with a tone close to sadness. She was sad because _that_ life had to end. She was sad that she was given _this_ life instead…

Roland felt his heart skip a beat. She had been in love with him he wagered…

"Wanna know what I think?" Roland asked.

"What?"

"I think that Heat had been having dreams about you too."

"What?" she asked, disbelief written all over her face. She turned on her side and put her palms on the space between them, leaning towards him ever so slightly. Roland fought back the blush that was threatening to come above his face and so, he brought his right hand to his face and arranged his glasses, hoping that she would not see his face.

He cleared his throat and continued, "As I was saying, I think he kept dreaming about you too. But he didn't understand it; the way you didn't as well. That was why he kept pestering and kept picking on you. He knew you to be a part of his past somewhere; a piece of his mental puzzle that didn't quite fit in anywhere. But one thing's for sure. He really cared about you."

Argilla raised an eyebrow, "And you know this…how?"

"He had nothing but your interest in mind. That was why he wanted you to devour others. It was for you. And the fact that he didn't understand his feelings only aggravated the situation; he tended to lash out on you whenever he would see an opportunity. I'm guessing that he enjoyed your slap too." he finished with a smirk, his right eye winking at her.

"I know, _I_ would." he said suggestively.

Argilla, on instinct, slapped him, "Pig…!"

Roland slightly hissed as he felt her hand on his cheek; hissed in pain and pleasure. If her touch could mean this much pleasure within his body, then, she was free to hit him whenever she'd want. He was truthful though; he _did_ enjoy her slap. But the word "enjoy" was an understatement…He relished in her touch.

"So, what do you feel about Heat now?" he asked, surprising her.

She blinked and then, gave him a bored look, "Heat isn't even the issue here…I feel nothing for him of that kind anymore."

"Anymore?"

She blushed, "I meant that, what happened in the past, in my past life, was over and done with. If Heat and I were together back then, well, now, we aren't. We aren't in love like that. He fell in love with someone else and I…fell in love with someone else too."

She didn't know why but as she relinquished her feelings for Heat and telling Roland that he had found someone else, she suddenly felt a stinging pain in her heart; poking at her organ relentlessly.

Her face probably said it too for Roland draped a hand on her shoulder, "You know, I think he'll always be a part of you even though you guys live different lives now. Don't worry about it too much. Your hair will turn like mine…or Serph's. You're thinking too much."

She chuckled, "Thanks for that. I needed it. Besides, I think that there's more to your explanation than just plain crap. Maybe he really did…care."

Roland smiled at her; she was in love with someone else now…

Well, that could only be the one and only fearless leader of Embryon.

Serph.

xxxxx


	2. Man in My Present

**A/N: Disclaimer: Refer back to Chapter 1. **

**WARNING: OOC, SUGGESTIVE LANGUAGE**

**Chapter 2: The Man in My Present.**

"So…" he said, stretching his arms a bit, "How about Mr. Silent and Brooding? How does he fit into your life?" he asked in a tone as if he were the paparazzi waiting for the next big scoop.

Argilla laughed, "Serph? He's…he's a special person to me."

Roland laughed ruefully; of course that was what she would say…She was his lover. Of course she loved him.

"But…"

What was this? A word of doubt maybe?

"He's…I dunno…He's perfect." she said with a sad sigh.

"Huh?" Roland asked, moving a bit closer to where she sat. He took a deep breath before doing so though; after all, she might think that he was invading her space…And he really didn't want to get on her bad side, especially that they were now sharing a meaningful conversation.

Conversation?

It was more like, him interrogating her about her personal love life. Like a lovesick schoolgirl. But still, this was the only way that he could get to know her…

After all, when Serph came back, he wouldn't get the chance to talk to her again.

"What do you mean he's perfect?" he asked in a low tone, a slow chuckle building up from within, "There's no such thing as the perfect person Argilla."

She smiled sadly, "Well…he is. He's strong, he's kind…he's handsome…His everything that any woman could want."

"I don't understand where the problem is Argilla." Roland said truthfully.

"The problem is that, maybe I don't deserve him. I mean, when we were at the Junkland, before we got together, when Sera first came, I was surprised to find that I was…a little jealous of her. She was different from the rest of the women in the Junkland. She was the only one to have strange yet striking black hair and piercing and yet soothing silver eyes…Before her, we didn't feel any emotions…We didn't know what love or hate was. She was the one who eased our suffering when we would go crazy from the hunger."

She then laughed humorlessly, throwing her head back, "Ah…She would sing for us, a song. That song soothed our spirits…Back then," she paused, furrowing her eyebrows together, "she had Serph's full attention; and Heat's as well. Before, I didn't mind it. I loved Sera too. But…somewhere along the way, I began to imagine what it would be like if I had that sort of attention from Serph…"

"What would it be like if he looked at me the way he looked at her?" she asked dreamily.

"Er…How did Serph look at Sera?" Roland asked, scratching his head.

"Like this." she said as she clasped her hands together in front of her bosom, as if she were praying, with her pink eyes, dilating like a faithful dog's and her eyelashes batting slowly, yet seductively.

Roland leaned back, "Whoa…that's some powerful eye-work there…" he said; chuckling softly. And he wasn't kidding. Her eyes were mesmerizing; they were sparkling, speaking to him. He gulped lightly; he really shouldn't look any deeper into her eyes…

'Nope. I shouldn't.' he thought, laughing nervously.

She laughed as well, "See what I mean? Anyway, it's just that I began to feel jealous of her. And then, after we conquered the Maribel Tribe, there was a girl who claimed that she would give herself to Serph; that she would let Serph 'devour' her anytime he'd want. I'll tell you that her definition of the word 'devour' doesn't include the splattering of blood, the ripping of flesh or the disembowelment of organs! Oh no…she had _that_ sort of 'devour' in mind!"

She shuddered, "Well, at that moment I just felt so angry that I wanted to rip her apart!" she finished, anger lacing her voice, her hands shaking in fury as she clenched them in front of her face.

Roland sweat-dropped. She could be scary…

She sighed and slumped her shoulders forward, leaning a bit on the edge, "So, going back to Sera…I just…I just think that maybe Serph would be better off with a person like her. She was perfect too…"

Roland looked at her sympathetically. He would love nothing more than to proclaim his intentions but…That would be wrong. It would look like as if he was trying to steal her away from Serph.

And what was more was that she really loved that strange man.

His hand found hers and she looked at him, questioning what he was doing. He smiled at her sheepishly, "Look. I'm no love guru or whatever, but it just seems to me that you shouldn't feel that way at all."

"Huh?"

Roland laughed, "I don't know about this Sera person, but…Serph, he, he chose to be with you didn't he?"

Argilla raised an eyebrow and Roland continued, "He could have chosen to look for Sera the way Heat did. Or he could have chosen to put himself in reserve until you guys found Sera right?"

He sighed, "I'm not making any sense am I? What I mean is that, Serph chose you and not Sera. So, what's the problem? He chose you because you're the one he wants. Perfect or no, you're the one he wants to be with. End of story."

Up to that point, Roland wasn't exactly sure if he managed to get his meaning across.

But as her lips slowly tugged upwards, he knew that he had succeeded.

"Thanks for that."

Roland nodded, smiling a bit, "Not a problem Argilla."

"So, I guess…you and Serph really went through hell and back huh?"

She nodded, "I guess you could say that. When I woke up in your world, he was the first one my eyes saw…"

Roland wanted to laugh right there. His eyes were the first things that she saw in their world? 'I mean, come on! Is this Soap Opera Central or something?'

She sighed, "He was the one who found me. I don't mean to be really sappy, but, you know, when I looked into his eyes…it was as if I was falling…"

Then, suddenly, as if she had discovered that what she had told him was a complete farce, she slapped her palm on her mouth and laughed, "Oh my God. Did I just say that crap?"

Roland didn't know whether to join in her laugh or just sit there, totally still. He chose neither. "Yeah, well, it's fine. Don't worry about it. Everyone's got their weaknesses."

She sighed again; but this time, it was out of relief. She then did something that Roland didn't expect. She scooted closer to him, eliminating all spaces between them and rested her head on his shoulder.

Roland froze and he fought back the pleasurable jolt that his body was threatening to have. He couldn't let her know that he was feeling awkward and at the same time, thrilled at her sudden bold action.

"You know," she spoke once more, a cheerful feeling within her voice, "there was a time that I pretended to be Sera. We disguised me as Sera so that we could fool the other tribe."

She chuckled again, "Well, we succeeded…but there was Bat." Suddenly her countenance had taken a hundred and eighty degree turn as her face contorted to a face of regret, "I couldn't defend myself…"

She paused, deep in thought. Roland cleared his throat, "Then what happened?"

"Well, I was useless…Bat had me…I thought I was going to die."

"But you didn't. Serph saved you." Roland finished for her, knowing where the story was going. It was the typical "prince charming saves the damsel" theme.

But still, he was amazed. These people had gone through hell and back…And he was finding Argilla all the more interesting.

"Yeah. He did. After that…well, I felt guilty that I was useless. I couldn't even fend off one enemy. And I felt so grateful to Serph. He just kept on helping me…"

Suddenly, her calm and cheerful countenance changed. He noticed it as he felt her stiffen and pressed herself further against him.

"And now, I know he's mad at me…"

Roland nodded, "So that's why he was not in the mood today huh?" So that was why Serph chose to leave her behind at Lokapala. That was why he decided to take Gale and Cielo instead.

"Yeah…But I really don't know why…I haven't done anything!" she yelled in protest, raising her head to look him in the eyes.

Roland shrugged his shoulders, "I don't know what to tell you Argilla. But, just give him time. He'll come around. I mean, he can't stay mad at you forever right?" he asked, sweat-dropping at his pathetic and lame attempt to cheer her up.

Argilla gave him a bored look, but nonetheless nodded, "Thanks for the effort. I'll definitely give you an A for effort."

Then, she rested her head on his shoulder once more, sighing and closing her eyes wearily as a playful breeze passed them by, letting the loose locks of her pink hair dance and sway carelessly.

Roland sighed too.

Well, this was the moment that he had waited for, for a while now; alone time with her. He was going to cherish this forever.

"So," he said unevenly, "I guess that it's really Serph for you huh?"

She giggled, "Oh Roland, I would love nothing more than to say to you that it's just Serph that I'm going to be loving for the rest of my life…"

Suddenly, the flame of hope that he had thought that had been long extinguished suddenly lit up again, "What do you mean?"

She giggled, "There have been a lot of things that had happened in our lives that are too…dire…too unbelievable. What I'm saying is that, he's here now, with me, but who knows what will happen in the future? Or in the near future? What if he decided that he didn't want me anymore? What then?"

Roland nodded in understanding. A person's heart can change as quickly as it can change back. That was what feelings were…Time and circumstance change a person…

"All I'm telling you is that…it would be wonderful if Serph and I could be together for the rest of our days…But there can come things between us that might one day be too great for us to resist. There may come a rift in between us that is too wide for us to bridge."

She sighed.

"To tell you the truth, I'm scared. I'm scared of what may happen."

"Did you tell him any of this?" asked Roland, looking at her pink eyes seriously.

She stiffened again, "No. I didn't."

"You should." he replied curtly, "He deserves to know what you feel…and what you fear. Argilla, I know you're new to relationships, but I gotta tell you that communication between you two is imperative. Just talk to him about it."

"I suppose I should."

xxxxx

Serph walked along the quiet streets of Lokapala. He, Gale and Cielo had scouted the new city. They were surprised to say the least. They had never seen such a city.

But still, they were pleased.

They had gathered the desired data. It would seem that Sera and Heat were at the Administrative Building.

Well, tomorrow, they would have to leave for the aforesaid building; all five of them. Pain suddenly gripped his heart. Argilla…He had a little spat with her earlier and that resulted in him avoiding her and leaving her behind.

He really didn't want to, but after what he had heard the night before, nothing but insult plagued his body.

How could she sleep with him while she dreamt of another?

He cast his face down sadly; finding the dirty and dusty ground all the more interesting. And now, he could only wonder what she was doing. He suddenly thought of Roland.

He narrowed his eyes slightly. Yes; the platinum-haired man liked her as well. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to leave the two alone together…

He cursed himself. But still, he had no choice. He couldn't take Roland with him; he'd annoy the crap out of him. And he was as sure as hell that he couldn't bear to look at Argilla at that time either. He needed space.

So, that was why he left her behind. But still, he suddenly stopped.

'Maybe I'm overreacting?' he asked himself.

'You got that right.' a voice within him joined in.

'Am I?'

'Look buddy, why don't you just ask her about it rather than just brooding like this? We have a perfectly working voice box. It wouldn't hurt to use it once in a while.'

Maybe his inner self was right…

xxxxx

Argilla smiled and raised her head once more, looking at his eyes. He, in turn looked back at her, his eyes twinkling in both embarrassment and excitement. He was embarrassed that he actually got himself to give her meaningful advice when he himself was a screw-up.

But at the same time, he could feel his heartbeat's pace hasten as she gazed within his eyes.

"That's good to know. Wait a minute!" he suddenly blurted out.

"What?"

"What about Gale or Cielo?"

"What about them?" she asked, bored.

"Didn't you ever consider them as…you know…?"

Her pink eyes dilated at such an exaggerated form that she thought they were going to fall out of their sockets! Gale and Cielo? Prospective lovers?

She wanted to barf…

"No…! Never!" she said immediately.

"Why not? I mean, Gale isn't bad looking, although I could understand why you'd never go for Cielo though…Did you see that hair? And that accent?"

Argilla laughed as Roland continued to verbally assault her blue-haired comrade, "You're mean aren't you? For a moron, you sure have a big mouth!"

He winced at that and laughed sheepishly; she still called him that. He sighed; well, that was how she knew him anyway. As a moron. She was never impressed with him anyway.

"Just kidding, but seriously…never? Not even once?"

Argilla blushed, "Gale and Cielo are like brothers to me. It could never be anything more than that. Now, enough about them. You're starting to creep me out!"

"Okay, okay I understand. So I'm guessing that Heat is the man from your past while Serph is the man in your present. Am I right?" he asked seriously, leaving the thoughts of Gale and Cielo behind.

Argilla tilted her head to the side and thought for a moment before responding, "I guess so…when you really think about it."

She suddenly laughed heartily, "I guess you're right. But Heat…like you said-he's in the past. I don't want to dwell on that anymore. Now that I've understood that my dreams are my past life, I want to move on."

He nodded in concurrence.

She smiled and continued, "Yeah…I want to live my life with Serph…"

Roland felt a wrench in his gut as she said Serph's name. He knew that she would never like him and he had to content himself with having just fantasies of her, but still, experiencing it first-hand, her indirect rejection, was still painful for him.

But now…she suddenly stopped.

Roland blinked; she was looking at him funny.

Was there something on his face? What was it all of a sudden?

xxxxx


	3. Man in My Future

**A/N: Disclaimer: Refer back to Chapter 1. **

**WARNING: OOC, SUGGESTIVE LANGUAGE, LIME**

**Chapter 3: The Man in My Future**

"What's up? Something on my face?" Roland asked, chuckling nervously.

Argilla shook her head, "Enough about me Roland. What about you? Don't you have…anyone special in your life?"

"You're the _only_ one special to me Argilla. You know that." he said, wiggling his eyebrows playfully.

She snorted, "Yeah. Keep that up and I'll definitely make sure that you remember me."

Roland winced as he imagined some of the things that she could do to him.

'Probably castrate me.' he thought, gulping, 'Or worse…'

"Seriously," she said, the earlier look of displeasure giving way to a look of cheerfulness, "was there…or is there someone special in your life?"

Roland's smile disappeared from his face, "Once. But…he died."

Argilla gave him a flabbergasted look, "Oh…! I didn't know that you were…a…"

"Huh?" Roland asked, not understand where she was going. Wait. Did she think that he was…? Oh my. Well, it was his fault anyway for making it sound so…suggestive!

'Great…The only woman I've ever confided in thinks that I'm gay.' he thought with disdain.

"You got me all wrong Argilla. I'm not…gay." he said seriously, his eyes flashing at hers firmly.

Argilla sweat-dropped, "Oh you're not?"

Well, she felt relieved to say the least. Roland was…alright to look at. He wasn't ugly or highly unattractive and it would be a loss for the female populace should he really was…rooting for the other team.

'But still, he's nothing compared to Serph.' her inner self said defiantly.

'I know that. I'm just saying that…'

'Then don't say anything!'

"No." he said seriously, laughing a bit, "I'm not. Surprised?"

She vigorously shook her head, "No! Not at all! In fact, I was surprised when you implied that uh…Well, forget about it. Anyway, you were telling me about your…uh, special person."

She rested her head on his shoulder again as she waited for him to tell her his story.

"Well, this guy, he used to be the leader of this place…I looked up to him a lot. He was a brave and kind man. He was really worthy of praise. He was Fred's father."

"Well," Roland paused, "when he died, I just didn't know what to do…I just…It was my fault that he died."

Argilla furrowed her eyebrows, "How is that?"

"I let him die…I left him to die…"

Argilla took his hand in hers, "I don't believe that Roland…You've been with us in some missions now and you have yet to abandon us. Whatever sins that you may have done in the past are in the past. Like I said, that is over and done with. What you could do now, is make amends for that. That's it."

He laughed sadly, "Yeah well…that's just what I'm doing. But sometimes, I just wonder whether or not what I'm doing is enough…Sometimes, I just feel that nothing's ever going to be enough…"

Argilla sighed, "People who suffer all feel that it's never enough. When we were at the Junkland, we felt that our sins must've been so great for us to be punished that way…And that our sacrifices weren't enough."

She pulled back and touched his face, turning it so that their eyes met, "But you know what, just keep at it, and one day, you'll be forgiven. There's always light at the end of a dark tunnel."

Roland felt his heart soften and lighten at her words…and her soft pink eyes. They were filled with so much understanding.

'Serph is really lucky to have someone like her.' he thought with a feeling of envy.

But fighting back the blood that was furiously traveling through his veins, he instead focused on her face and leaned in, "Well…there are other tunnels that I'm thinking of right now…"

He knew that it was a cheap and lewd remark, but it was the only thing that he could think of to throw her off guard and get him off of the emotional high of being sappy. He didn't want to be any more moronic or weak in front of her eyes than he already did anyway.

She slapped him, "You _are_ a pig; you know that?"

So, she wasn't new to sexual jokes was she? No matter how lame…

Suddenly, the air felt heavy with aloofness and awkwardness as they saw that there was nothing else to talk about. And now, they just found one another's eyes.

Wanting to break the sudden tense air around them, he suddenly pasted a silly grin on his face, "Hey, Serph isn't the only man around you know…?" he insinuated shamelessly.

She seemed to have disregarded his comment and suddenly, she flung herself at him, her lips pressing themselves against his firmly. Well, it was either she disregarded his comment or took it into careful consideration as she thought of kissing him.

Roland was taken aback. What was she doing?

'She's kissing us you idiot!'

'Oh right…This feels nice…' he said blissfully as he felt her soft and moist lips on his. He wanted so much to respond to her kiss…He wanted to pry her lips apart and explore her wet cavern…He wanted to unlock her mouth's entire secret…And to taste the intoxicating wine within…

But suddenly, it was all over.

She pulled back and looked at him with a genuine smile on her face, "I figured you needed that after listening through all of my crap."

"What?" Roland asked, trying his best to look offended. Of course he wanted a kiss. He had wanted one ever since he laid eyes on her. But then, his hopes and ambitions died as he once caught her and her silver-haired leader locked in a dance of lips.

Well, she was taken.

Oh well, tough luck.

"No…I really enjoyed it…I really enjoyed our conversation." he trailed off offhandedly.

She then punched him playfully on the arm, "Don't give me that crap Roland. I'm not stupid."

He winced, "I never said you were…"

She giggled, "Then don't say anything anymore. Leave it at that." She knew that Roland liked her. But still, she didn't want to alienate him from her just because she knew. No. That wouldn't be fair to him. She'd treat him like a friend, just like everyone else, crush or no crush.

The line was just drawn as to what she was to do as she knew of his infatuation with her; to flirt or not.

'Nope. Of course not. But right now, I feel that I could bend the rules a bit.' she justified inwardly.

Roland chuckled, "Alright, alright. You got me. Fine, I did want a kiss. Happy now?"

She giggled and rested her head on his shoulder again. This time, feeling a bit empowered, Roland put a shaking hand over her shoulder. She sighed in contentment, just inhaling his scent.

She giggled again.

He smelled different from Serph.

Serph smelled like sandalwood and of the fresh rain, but Roland smelled like something else…Something that she couldn't figure out.

"Hey Roland?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you wear perfume?"

He laughed, "Well, yeah." Well, that caught him off guard. They were just discussing about life and their emotional problems and then suddenly, she was going to ask him about his…perfume?

"Which one?"

Roland sweat-dropped. She really wouldn't know even if he told her; so, why bother? But still, he saw this as another opportunity to rile her up.

"You smell like something, but I can't figure it out. I've smelled this before. I just know it!" she openly declared, raising her head from his shoulder to look at his face.

Roland leaned in closer to her, "Well, you'd just have to keep smelling me I guess, until you figure it out…" he commented suggestively again.

She slapped him playfully and rolled her eyes, "Yeah sure. I think you're in way over your head moron. You already have your one bloody kiss. Don't count on that happening again. Or getting more than that for that matter!"

He sweat-dropped at her comment, but chose to ignore it.

He leaned in once more, "I just think that you shouldn't just invest everything on Serphy- boy. I mean, there are _other_ men out there too…"

She snorted, "Really? Know anyone personally?"

Roland sweat-dropped, "Yeah…" he leaned in further, their faces merely an inch apart, "Me…"

"The man in my future?" she asked, whispering against his face, her breath on his cheek.

"If you want me to be…" he whispered back, leaning in, slowly closing his eyes.

"Argilla?"

The two froze. Argilla turned her head and there, she saw Serph looking at her with his head tilted onto the side, a look of confusion and a bit of hurt written in his eyes.

"Serph!"

He wasn't supposed to see that. She was just having some harmless fun with Roland…It was no biggie; not really. It was just that Serph came at the wrong time; that was all. It wasn't as if she had any intention of really taking Roland or his silly proposals seriously.

'I mean, come on!' she told herself…

But still…

'The man in my future huh? Well…maybe…Who knows?'

She looked back at Roland, "Tough luck Roland. Maybe in the near future. I'll see you later." she said firmly, smiling a bit, hitting him firmly on the arm. And with that, she hopped out of from where they sat and ran over to where Serph was.

"Sorry about that Serph." she told him sincerely, beaming at seeing him. Well, he was probably not mad at her anymore. But seeing her with Roland, alone atop of the HQ might give him the wrong impression.

"Was I interrupting something?" he said, jealousy evident in his voice.

She was right. He did get the wrong impression. Well, she'd best remedy it as quick as she can. The last thing she needed was for him to be mad at her again after he had gone over the first issue that got him mad in the first place.

She turned back to look at Roland and waved goodbye before turning to look at Serph's deep silver pools, "No, you weren't. Come on. Let's go."

"Yes. We have to talk." he agreed, as he led her through the doorway. She nodded; it was time to face the music.

Roland looked on after them even after they were long gone. He felt his lips and grinned, "Well…maybe in the near future huh? I'll hold you to that Argilla."

xxxxx

"So, what did you want to talk about?" Argilla asked, as she climbed on their bed.

Serph followed her and when he was comfortable, he sat up and looked at her, "I heard you whisper Heat's name in your sleep. Why?" he asked sternly, with no emotions gracing his words.

Argilla nodded; it was _that_ subject huh? Time to bite the bullet.

"Well, I had a dream about him." she responded just as sternly, mimicking his tone.

"Why?" he asked again, his voice as unfeeling and cold as ever.

Argilla took a deep breath, "Serph…Heat…is…a part of my past. I just know it. That dream wasn't just a dream. It was a memory…And in that memory, well, he was the one for me."

She gazed sadly at him as his eyes met the blanket. She cupped his face in her hands, "But it doesn't mean anything Serph. It doesn't. He was then…but you're the one with me now."

He forced his eyes to meet hers and he looked into her pink jewels with the outmost of fragile hope.

"You're the one with me now…You're the one I want to be with Serph. Not him." she whispered as she pulled herself closer to him, kissing him on his lips, her lips nipping on his bottom one.

She chuckled as he groaned and pulled her tight against his firm chest.

"But…" he said, hesitating, pulling back from their chaste kiss, "What about Roland?"

Argilla arched an eyebrow, "What about him? He's a friend Serph…nothing more…But…"

"But?" Serph was bracing himself for the potential damage that her words might inflict on him. This was the cliché "yes, but" statement after all.

"But…it all might change in the future. Who knows, I might fall in love with him one day." she said honestly, trying her best not to hurt him but let him see the truth within the sands of time.

Time changed people.

"Heat was my past; you are my present…and one day, Roland might be my future." she told him nonchalantly. She saw the hurt in his eyes and she immediately sighed, "Don't look like that Serph. After all, who ever said about me leaving you? It might be the other way around. What if you decide to leave me for Sera? Or any other woman?"

There. She had taken Roland's advice. She had voiced out her feelings and fears to Serph. Granted, she didn't say it in a soothing or gentle way, but she didn't really want to appear too sappy in his eyes. Besides, being too sappy was too out of character for her.

"It won't happen." he automatically responded; his steely silver eyes burning with determination.

"And you won't fall in love with him." he said with a tone of absolute finality.

"And how do you know that?" she openly challenged him.

"I won't let you."

"You won't?" she told him, openly defying his statement.

He shook his head and grasped her arms tightly, "I won't…let you fall in love with him. The future has yet to be written…I…I will write it right." he replied with outmost sincerity.

Argilla almost became teary-eyed at his response…It was exactly the type of response that she wanted to hear…

She suddenly tackled him on their bed, taking him by complete surprise…He chuckled at her eagerness…She kissed him with arduous fervor and he complied, letting their hot tongues dance with each other's…

Soon, they found themselves totally unclothed, their bodies just aching to be with one another…Serph ran a hand through her body, a jolt of electricity passing through his veins as he did so…Argilla shuddered in bliss as she felt his feather-light fingers on her burning skin…

Oh how she craved this man…

And not long after that, they had united their bodies…and their souls. And now the night had rolled even darker and the hour grew ever late, the two had long settled within each other's arms.

Argilla suddenly thought of Roland. Well, it would seem that he wasn't such a moron after all. His advice came through and it was because of him that she and Serph understood one another on a whole new level. She snuggled closer to Serph; her arm draped over his bare body and slowly closed her eyes, falling limp against the warm caress of slumber.

Serph held the woman in his arms gently yet firmly. He thought of what she had told him. It hurt, yes, but it was the truth.

The only thing certain about the future was its uncertainty. She _could_ fall out of love with him any time and she _could_ fall in love with Roland any time.

It was true that time and circumstance can change a person, but it was also true that a person can remain the same for the rest of his days. He could fall in love and stay in love with the same person for the rest of eternity.

He can change that truth so that he could change the future…

And that was what Serph wanted to do. He wanted to change the possibility of just being Argilla's present…and becoming her past as she moved on with Roland…

No. He wouldn't let that happen.

'Not in this lifetime.'

xxxxx

Roland climbed in his bed and lay down with a smile on his face. Sure, that she was with Serph as he thought these thoughts, but at least, he had achieved what he had wanted.

A kiss.

He blinked. He thought for moment, his countenance serious, and suddenly, a moment later, he burst out laughing. Before, as she explained to him the nature of her existence and her comrades' as well, he had found it a bit hard to swallow.

He even had himself doubting whether or not she had been of flesh and blood.

But, as she kissed him that evening, he knew that she was real. She was indeed human as he was or anyone that he had ever met, for that matter.

And then, his thoughts wandered to the last thing she told him.

"_Tough luck Roland. Maybe in the near future. I'll see you later."_

'Maybe in the near future…'

Slowly, he closed his eyes, letting sleep overwhelm him. Maybe someday, they could be together. Who knows?

There was always hope.

xxxxx

FIN


End file.
